Lancelot of Little Egypt

Lancelot of Little Egypt

The Right Pitch

A short story I sold to Riddlebird Literary Magazine.

Lancelot Schaubert's avatar
Lancelot Schaubert
Nov 24, 2024
∙ Paid
yellow beans on white ceramic bowl
Photo by wu yi on Unsplash

She came wielding the plastic doll that smelled of off gasses.

“No,” Matt said to his daughter from the comfort of his couch. “Go to the table.”

“Want you see this,” she tried. She had tried before.

Matt said, “Okay, I’ll see. Go to the table.” He grabbed hold of the little plastic doll, its figure deformed by decades of institutional frat boy body-shaming. When his daughter turned, he hurled her doll like a tiny blond-haired throwing axe over his shoulder. Blindly.

User's avatar

Continue reading this post for free, courtesy of Lancelot Schaubert.

Or purchase a paid subscription.
© 2026 Lancelot Schaubert · Privacy ∙ Terms ∙ Collection notice
Start your SubstackGet the app
Substack is the home for great culture